Saturday, May 21, 2011

You will be my friend - with benefits?

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Slaps many across the face may have begun with these exact words. Today, it seems that everyone is dabbling in friend with benefits relations, because it still allows for the freedom to play the field without commitment.

In the light of recent films such as "No strings attached", which is the real skinny friends with benefits relations? Are they destined to end in hearts broken and broken friendships? This can sometimes happen, but not always. There are no rules standardized in the game of love and as an incalculable number of people have reiterated, "" you don't get to choose who you fall in love.""

Although there were a few friends who have taken their relationship to the next level and begin sleeping together, the hard truth is that most of them does not lead to dating relationships or marriage. The reasoning behind this statement must be clear to most people, but it is not. If two people interested in the other, they would already be dating. The very basis of the friend with benefits is to use one of the other sex and sex only.

After having spoken with about 50 people about their experiences of having a friend with benefits, 98% of respondents said that it is not complete. This occurs when a person develops feelings stronger than the other partner. It is this inequality, which causes the relationship at the end of evil. Some friends have been able to dispose of them without as much scratch, but again, this is rare.

A monumental misunderstanding on both sexes is that women relate to love sex and men do not. In fact, women release a hormone called oxytocin during orgasm, that promotes feelings of love and well-being. The same cannot be said of men. Common sense dictates that sex is invariably cause women develop feelings of love, thus disrupting the balance of equality.

What happens when these contracts secret sex only end? Can two friends return to be "only" friends once more? It is difficult to increase the implementation with respect to privacy and then turn around and return to what you were before. It is the rare friendship of sex face which can go back to business as usual after making sex enter the picture.

As a person with degrees in sociology, social work and psychology, I have a bit of wisdom that I would like to share. If you value friendship, never accept a friends with benefits arrangement. If you do not see a future with this person, it can work. Here's how.

Each person must agree to rules of the game. If one or the other partner starts to develop feelings beyond friendship, the arrangement must complete. Clear communication between the two parties is an absolute necessity for friendship with the benefits of working relationship. Some people have made this type of working arrangement, but my advice is for you, advance.

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